Yesterday I broke one of the first rules your parents ever teach you, I talked to a stranger. As the title suggests I went even further and shared a meal with a stranger. I was down in Mount Vernon and went to a local diner for breakfast. Barb's is one of those places you wouldn't stop in if you drove by, but it's one of those small town treasures you can't miss. Good food for low prices, and really friendly service.
I went in and the place was more crowded than normal, to be fair I was there a lot later than I usually am. I headed for the one empty table in the place, when the older man sitting at the table next to it told me to "Have a seat young man." I'm an introvert, and so meeting new people isn't high on my priority list. Plus I had a plan for the day and didn't want to get stuck at Barb's for the rest of the morning. However, I didn't want to be rude, and since he invited me I sat down. Initially it was a little awkward, he was on his phone so I checked my email while I waited for the waitress, but not wanting to be labeled as one of those millennials who can't be separated from their phone, I put it away and after ordering a glass of water and some pancakes, I introduced myself to my table buddy. His name is Ron Campbell.
We talked about how cold it was outside, he mentioned how the wet weather is good for mushrooms, showed me a picture of the four pounds of morels he had collected, and then told me his plan for the day was to cut them up. He asked where I was from and if I was a student at the local college, to which I told him I had graduated a few years ago and that I was from the Cleveland area. That shifted the focus of the rest of our breakfast conversation to Cleveland sports.
Ron told me about the players he had seen and met back in the day. About the ways he had gotten tickets to games (all legally), and about how he really thinks this is the year for the Indians. It was a good a breakfast conversation, and as I left part of me was thinking, I want to be like Ron. I would love to be the old guy who sits in a local diner on Saturday mornings and just invites people to sit down to engage them in conversation. It's a stretch for my personality, but it's an idea I really love. So many people are just looking for someone to listen, and food is an easy medium for conversation.
In the world of the ancient near east there was an unwritten social custom involving food and water. If you gave a person a drink of water this custom required you to be friends for one year. If two people shared a meal together, they were required to be friends for life. When I first read that my mind immediately went to Romans 12.20 (quoted from Proverbs 25.21), "But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head." The Bible says here, to give our thirsty enemies water and if they are hungry to feed them. In light of this social custom the Bible says to turn an enemy into a friend.
Ron and I were not enemies before yesterday morning, I had never seen him before, but after sharing that meal, there is an argument that we should be friends. Honestly, I enjoyed talking with him, and if I lived down this way I would probably frequent Barb's on Saturday mornings, in which case we would probably become friends. But this never would have happened if Ron had just let me sit down at the one remaining empty table.
God created us for relationships, but relationships don't happen in a world where we like to keep to ourselves, go about our business, and fill the down times with our smart phones. Relationships happen when we invite people to have a seat and break out of our comfort zones to talk.
There is another old man who I've seen for years, we refer to him as "hard core old guy" and we call him that because no one knows his name. Everyday he walks to the campus in his gray sweats or shorts depending on the weather, sits in the library reading the paper, and then goes to the cafeteria to eat. For four years I saw him on campus, and during my recent visits I still see him walking. He's never given off the impression that he's interested in talking to anyone. I've heard that people have tried and he isn't thrilled to be bothered.
At the rate I've been going, I'd end up like hard core old guy, but I don't want to be that way. I don't want to give off the vibe that the people around me are a nuisance and that I just want to be left alone to go about my routine. I want to be the guy who invites others to sit down, learns about who they are, and shares stories about what I've learned along the way. I want to be the old guy who shares meals and makes life long friends.
This is what God intended for us. Yes, for the introverts it's a potentially terrifying idea, and even now I'm thinking about all the excuses I can make for putting this off until "someday", but the longer I wait the more like hard core old guy I become. I want to be inviting. I want to impact people, even if it's just one meal on a random Saturday morning.
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
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