You're not, neither are they, and no one has to be, by Will

I'm not sure exactly when it started, but at some point during college I began to feel like I had to take the weight of the world on my shoulders. I felt like I always had to have the answer and people expected me to be perfect. I felt like I couldn't need anyone because everyone needed me. After I graduated and entered full time ministry the weight got heavier. I expected so much from myself, and I felt like everyone else expected it too.

The Bible says in James 3 that many should not become teachers because there is a stricter judgment for those who teach. This does come from God, those who seek to lead and influence are held accountable to the Lord of all for how they use their position over His creation. However, this judgment is not limited just to God. Those who seek to lead incur stricter judgment from people as well.

Complete honesty speaking as a pastor, I'm amazed at the things people have said to me about why they don't want to offend me. They feel that pastors have a closer relationship with God to the point where they can influence Him to make the lives of others more difficult, or even keep them out of heaven. On the other hand you have people that see you as infallible and perfect. I had already put so much pressure on myself, trying to live up to a standard that I couldn't attain, and honestly I was lonely. When you have to carry the weight of the world, unable to share how your feel or communicate what you need, you're on an island alone. It's stressful and it's a horrible way to live. So let's just get this out there,

I'm not perfect. I'm not infallible. I make mistakes. I fall short. I sin.

I know how people view pastors because I have viewed pastors the same way. I have had the privilege to know and learn from some amazing men. I am blessed to know a Sage (the final stage Eldredge identifies in the masculine journey, and very rare in this day and age) and being able to sit at his feet and learn from his sixty plus years on earth. But in all honesty I've put him, as well as more than a few other men, on pedestals, seeing them as infallible with no flaws or faults.

They are not perfect. They are not infallible. They make mistakes. They fall short. They sin.

I'm not perfect, they aren't perfect, and that's ok because none of us has to be.

A few months ago I heard a quote, "They were great men with huge flaws, and you know what — those flaws almost made them greater." The Sage I know has constantly displayed humility. Once he spoke on sin, and in the program had listed one hundred different sins. He said that he decided to pick the seven he struggled with the most and pray about one each day of the week. What hit me was when he said, "I had trouble narrowing it down to seven." He is a great man with huge flaws, but his flaws make him greater because they draw him closer to Christ.

In my reading a few weeks ago I found this, "Christians are not a special group of people who can be proud; Christians are those who are redeemed - and that is all!"

I'm not perfect, the men I look up to aren't perfect, and none of us have to be because Christ is. I do not have to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders because God holds it in His hand. I don't have to be perfect because I have been redeemed by Christ. It can own my flaws because they are opportunities to draw closer to Christ.

This realization has opened up so much. I've been able to build deeper relationships with the brothers who write this blog with me because I've realized it's ok to need them, and that they don't expect me to be perfect. I've been able to have more opportunities to minister because I don't have to have all the answers but simply point others to God. It's removed so much pressure from my life because I don't need to be perfect, or even act like I am.

God is perfect and I am not, and that's ok.

TO GOD ALONE THE GLORY!