Quiet, by Will

The world is loud, and I add to the noise. My life is full of chaos, and I've found myself unable to process so much of it because I don't allow myself to take time and be quiet. I really noticed this a few weeks ago. Over the past year I've been listening to audiobooks, I've listened to over 80 titles, several of them multiple times, and am currently listening to four (Gone with the Wind, The Grapes of Wrath, A Tale of Two Cities, and Becoming Myself). I just finished The Voyage of the Dawn Treader for the second or third time, and am waiting for more audible credits to complete the Narnia set.

I get most of my audiobooks off of YouTube, and pass the days at work by listening to the various titles on the "100 books to read before you die" list (I'm getting close to half way). The issue with work is that the wifi is spotty, and I'm not always able to load books later in the day. In these cases I resort to audible, thus my repeat listening.

A few weeks ago the wifi wasn't working, and nothing in my audible account was appealing, and so I just turned everything off, and went through the rest of my day and drive home with nothing playing. And it was a breath of fresh air. I miss silence.

For some reason, people seem to fear quiet. I think this is part of the reason music is always playing at stores and people are always on their phones. We fear silence and being alone with our thoughts. I listen to music when I study, and I even have a playlist in my phone labeled "Hiking". I have a music playlist to listen to when I'm in the woods trying to escape the rest of the world for a while! I've filled my life with so much noise, and it's hindering my ability to process.

My mind goes to Jesus. "In the early morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house, and went away to a secluded place, and was praying there." (Mark 1.35) Jesus was a busy guy, and he was extremely popular. His days were full of noise, and so He began His day early, in a quiet place, alone with God.

The first time I ever traveled internationally, aside from Canada, was in 2009 when I went to Israel for the first time. Jeremy was on the trip as well. The first three nights we stayed at a hotel in Tiberius, right on the Sea of Galilee. One morning, after a day full of touring the Holy Land, being inundated with information and overwhelmed to be walking where Jesus walked, the chaos of everything began to hit me. Jeremy and I got up before the sun and went down to a café, which was closed for the winter, and sat on their patio right next to the sea. It was one of the most peaceful experiences of my life. Watching the sun cut through the haze on the eastern shore, hearing the waves break as they hit the rocks, breathing in the cool air. That moment saved the trip for me.

I find myself longing for moments like this. I crave these moments of quiet solitude, and then I have to remind myself that I'm only missing them because of a lack of discipline. I'm up before the sun everyday, but the covers are so warm. I have time to pray and study the Bible, but with school it feels very academic, and there's some interesting video on YouTube. My drive provides me time to listen to a different book than at work, adding another one to my list. My blog needs to be written, my dog needs to be walked, my school work needs to be done. Noise and chaos.

I want the quiet. I crave it. I need it. It is in these moments when God is most clearly heard because there is nothing to distract my mind. I'm fighting for the quiet moments. I've found myself turning audible off for part of my drive. I've left my earbuds in the car when I hike. I've begun praying the moment I wake up in the morning.

I want to be intentional like Jesus. Getting up, embracing the darkness, and getting alone to be quiet with God.

TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!